Not to be confused with the word segue, a Segway is a two wheeled, battery powered vehicle designed for short trips such as going to the store or a motor-assisted walk through the park. The act of using a Segway is called "gliding" (according to the Segway website. I have never heard anyone call it gliding. I've also never seen one IRL).

According to the official Segway website, the act of gliding "feels like nothing you've ever experienced". However, this shows otherwise.

Segways were intended for covering relatively small amounts of land, compared to cars. Segways have nowhere near the speed that a car (at best, it travels a horrifying 12.5 mph or 20 kph) but Segways are smaller and 11 times more efficient than cars and give off no emissions. There are also some places where it is inappropriate to put your car.

Segways are many things, but here's a quick list of things they aren't:

1. A car

A common misconception. Segways are vehicles, but they are not cars.

2. A child having an identity crisis

Or at least, Segways are not this specific child.

3. The game Twister

Segways are also not Monopoly. Stop asking.

4. A twister

Or as normal people call them: "tornadoes".

5. Salad

Segways are not salad. They may or may not be women, though.

6. The Companion Cube

Unlike Companion Cubes, however, Segways can survive being thrown into incinerators. Unfortunately, Segways don't love you and only thinks of you as a friend.

7. Whatever this is

Looks pretty lame.

8. Doge

Well, looks like that's all! If I didn't mention something here, it's probably a Segway. Except for trees. I couldn't find a picture of one of those, but those aren't Segways either. Everything else is though, I think.